thoughts scribbled

Dear Mausam,
It has been more than a month since I have been in US, the job search finally looks like coming to an end. Everyday brings something new- new experiences, interesting interactions with strangers, something new to learn at every step. Just a mere task of walking into a new store is a learning experience. The images of movie "Crash" keep coming back to my mind everytime I walk in the street, ride a bus, journey thru a train. A stereotype exists in my mind for people from every race. Everytime I see people i recognise them as "Kaala", "Goraa","Mexikaa", "Chinka", "south indian" etc... and then I ask myself not to be judgmental of people the way I have always been. I remember the time in Delhi when Tinni used to ask me not to base my decisions about people by any pre-assumed notions. Nothing in this world is Black or white, everything is grey, just like I and you are.
Now that summers are here so people have started shedding clothes. But interestingly, yesterday I saw a girl from middle east dressed in black from head to toe and was wondering "she is also fighting the summer!, does'nt she has the urge to get into sleeveless just like other do?" We set our own limits, that girl was comfortable wrapping herself all over, the girls in india consider wearing sleeveless as a limit and girls here are fighting the summer by wearing shorts and minis.
Everytime I move in public domain I feel like I am a representative of my community and all actions of mine will make people judgmental about my community, so I always make an effort to be extra helpful, extra nice to people. (I wonder why I have this feeling of responsibilty when i know that there are millions of indians living outside india who have been representing india all around.)
The other day I was travelling in a train and I saw a desi guy and girl falling over each other, nobody reacted, coz it is considered a norm(It is not that everybody here share their passionate moment in public but itz just that people don't stare or react when they see somebody doing it)
I kept feeling uneasy about the whole situation,coz this is not acceptable from "where we come". Atleast people in india stop when they find someone around them and want to keep the private moment as private as possible and it certainly is not a moment to feel proud of like that desi guy felt. I made sure I stared at him as menacingly as possible coz that guy had a swagger about him and acted as if he has truly arrived in USA. I wish I could make him sit down and give him a lecture about morality!
Regards,
Ajj Kaim